#BlackBlogsMatter Challenge – Day 6 – Black Card Revoked

Welcome to the #BlackBlogsMatter challenge! Throughout the 28 days of February, my posts will not (necessarily) be about HR, Leadership or Management topics.


Blackness isn’t universal.

We don’t all live in dangerous urban areas, bka The Hood, and speak slang. We don’t all like the same foods and drinks. We don’t all have the same struggles.

Black people have the same range of human experiences and backgrounds as any other group. We would feel much more accepted, appreciated and included if people beyond our community would recognize and allow us the same latitudes given to White people instead of reducing us to caricatures and stereotypes to continue to perpetuate our perceived inferiority.

Woosah.

Despite the Black experience not being universal, we suuuuuuuuure have fun pretending that it is!!

*Tee hee hee*

Long before Cards for All People made it into an official game, Black people debated passionately the things that could get your Black Card revoked. Everyone has their list of comical comparisons which will result in loss of the privilege of being Black.

Here are my Top 5 — “Your Black Card Should be Revoked if ___________”

  1. You have NEVER seen The Color Purple movie … There are many movies that make-up this list. However, none more signature to my generation than The Color Purple.  If you’ve never seen the full movie and cannot cite it’s most famous lines, you need to give up your Card.
  2. You don’t know the words to at least 10 Luther Vandross songs … Luther is arguably the best R&B singer ever. And his songs are certainly well-known. If you don’t have an albums’ worth of those lyrics in your memory, you need to give up your Card.
  3. You use a narrow-tooth comb … Black hair comes in all colors and textures. None of them can successfully be managed with a narrow tooth. I don’t even know why manufacturers even put them in the package. We don’t use them. And if you torture yourself or your child by trying, you need to give up your Card.
  4. You call Kool-aid by flavors … This first presumes that you have and do drink Kool-aid that isn’t in juice box form. Most Black people have. And if you drink Kool-aid, you know that the flavors don’t mean anything. What the %$#& is the difference between Cherry and Tropical Punch, anyway?? It’s Red! And if you’re calling it anything other than Red, Purple or Blue, you need to give up your Card.
  5. Your Grandma doesn’t have framed photos of Jesus, Martin Luther King Jr and/or Barack Obama in her house … At least 2 of the 3 must be present. Commemorative statues, figurines and plates meet the requirements for the count. You get extra points for Black Jesus. Otherwise, I’m sorry but you’ve got to give up your Card. And take your grandma’s card too.

This is my list. And just like that classic 70s music compilation: you, my brother/sister, must get your own!

*NOTE: If you’re something other than Black and meet all these criteria, that’s awesome! It doesn’t make you Black tho. Please don’t say it does. If you play it cool, we may invite you to the Cookout and/or nominate you for a trade at some point. But not if you say stupid stuff like that. K’ThxBye!


Tune in tomorrow for Day 7 – The Key to Unity

 


2 Comments

  1. Hilarious!!!!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

*

© 2018 The Buzz on HR

Theme by Anders NorénUp ↑